What do R2D2 and Groot have in common? They can communicate freely with some of the protagonists, but viewers don’t understand anything they’re saying.

Here’s something to try out in your next session: Pair up two NPCs. One of them will act as a translator for the other one. Together, they make up a whole NPC.

Groot is obviously easier to pull off than R2D2, since “I am Groot” is really easy to say as a DM, as opposed to making a bunch of modem noises. When designing your NPC duo, keep that in mind. You’ll need to say everything twice and once might be in a made-up language.

Bumblebee from the Transformers and Kenku could also be interesting ways to pull off a similar effect, but that does require a lot more work unless you’re just brimming with culture references etc.

Try the table below to spark some ideas: Roll for each column and see what you come up with.

d10 R2D2 (The Incomprehensible One) Mode of Communication C3PO (The Translator) Mode of Translation
1 Mute ogre Grunts and gestures with a club Parrot with perfect diction Turns it into juicy gossip
2 Skeleton bard Rattles bones like maracas Necromancer’s apprentice Insists it’s deep philosophy
3 Kobold Hisses, growls, and burps sparks Gnome scholar Explains it as economic theory
4 Giant snail Leaves elaborate slime trails Overworked apprentice Reads them out like cricket scores
5 Goblin mime Acts everything out in pantomime Raven familiar Recasts it as sarcastic insults
6 Ancient treant One word per hour (if you’re lucky) Impatient halfling Summarizes with: “He says you’re all doomed”
7 Dwarf Only speaks in drinking songs Pedantic elf Translates into dry, boring prose
8 Banshee Wails at glass-shattering volume Bard Turns it into upbeat tavern jingles
9 Minotaur Communicates entirely via interpretive dance Blind fortune-teller Declares it’s all prophecy
10 Swamp hag Mutters frog noises and nonsense rhymes Very tired frog Translates flawlessly, but demands snacks first

E.g., I just rolled 8, 8, 3, 7 so we get A Banshee that wails at glass-shattering volume and a Gnome scholar who translates that into dry, boring prose. Be sure to have a handy list of rhyming words ready!

Of course, don’t stop here: Re-roll anything you don’t find inspiring, mix in some additional stuff from The Lazy GM’s Resource Document NPC Generator. I get “Brash”, and “Friendly”, “Spits a lot” and “Smokes a Pipe”.

So our duo now becomes a brash Banshee (let’s call her Henrietta) who’s diction includes a lot of saliva as she wailes at glass-shattering volume and a friendly Gnome scholar (let’s call him Mr. Torill) who smokes a pipe and translates that into dry, boring prose. Are they lovers? Why do they stay together? What do they want?